7.17.99

    I am finally beginning to right myself after the last few weeks of constant movement and controlled chaos. I am getting better from my vacation cold which turned into an ear infection. Several people have written asking me if I take enough vitamins or if maybe I have allergies. These are good things to take note of and I'll watch myself a little more.

    The thing is is that I'm so unwilling to have allergies. I know I probably don't have a choice but I've never been allergic to anything. Well, except now for penicillin. That was a shocker. If you remember, my last weeks in L.A. I was plagued with a head to toe itchy, red rash for trying to rid myself of a lingering head cold. Maybe my head cold was due to allergies?

    That can't be — unless I'm allergic to palm trees. I was sick with one thing or another from the moment I got to L.A. until the moment I left. From the beginning of April when we got to Oregon until I started my new job at the end of June I had never felt better. Usually, if you never had allergies you'll get them when you come to Oregon not when you leave. There's so much plant growth and pollen that people get sensitive to it. Someone once told me that the Indians named this valley Willamette because Willamette means sickness. Valley of Sickness. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

    I think I may have to buy into the "not enough vitamins" theory, though. T. and I eat very badly. Well, we're not horrible but we eat everything except vegetables. When we do eat vegetables it's because one of us remembers that we should be eating it and then we heat up something pathetic from a can. It's so bad. The thing is, I think I would eat more vegetables if I knew how to prepare them. No one has ever accused me of being a marvel in the kitchen. Perhaps I'll go to Barnes & Noble and see if I can find a cookbook dedicated to vegetables.

    I'm starting to feel it necessary to put little sticky notes around the apartment to remind me of the basic rules and necessities for human social life. For example, in the kitchen would be "make vegetables and eat them", "rinse your plate", "drink water." In the bedroom I'd have a sign telling me to put away my clothes and in the bathroom a sign that would say, "floss." I never can remember to floss. It's the worst habit I've gotten into. I'm very meticulous about brushing my teeth but flossing seems like such a lengthy pain in the ass.

    I have no "going to bed" routine of substance. Some girlfriends of mine have a whole process that I would never be able to maintain. I change into pajama's (which can be just about anything soft, there's no regulations here), then I brush my teeth and splash water on my face. Then, I go to bed. That's it. I've tried using facial cleansers but I usually end up breaking out so what's the point? I don't wear very much makeup and most of it comes off during the day anyway. I've found that just some room temperature water applied with the hands and dried with a towel is all I need. I should add floss to this routine, though. Definitely floss.

    T. and I have a very needy cat. That's not what cats are supposed to be about. They're supposed to be aloof, standoffish, independent. Oz has been meowing non-stop and loudly ever since we got back. Last night was the first night since we got home that he didn't wake us up at 3 a.m. by mewing in our ears and pawing at our legs. Maybe the unceremonious boot he got night before last told him something.

    T. is very concerned that, in addition to being needy, our cat is dumb. He might be right. I may have mistaken his initial behavior as cleverness when in fact it may have just been luck. See, he keeps hitting his head on stuff, especially the coffee table. He'll walk under it and when he comes to the edge he'll bonk his head on it. T. wants to pad the underside of the table. I want to get him a helmut. Actually, I figure that if it hurts him he'll stop. Maybe the front of his brain is soft and squishy anyway. Maybe we should start calling him "Lobe."

    I have decided to never, ever do a web site for free again. I will never volunteer to do a web site without any form of compensation or trade for services. I have discovered that the client who gets something for free is the worst and most ungrateful client you can find. Designing web sites is something that I really love. I love the graphic design and the strategic planning. I love the feeling that not only have I produced my vision but that I have created something that will be helpful and beneficial to the client. When I'm not getting paid to do any of that it becomes a labor of love. When I have delivered my labor of love it becomes a stab in the heart when they want to tear it down. I can't just say, "well, I got my money so I'll just go."

    I did the Los Angeles Webgrrls site (look at it fast before it's gone). It was two months late from when I hoped to complete it. During that time the only other person working on the site quit. It was all left to me. However, the first stage got done and it took a lot of effort on my part. While I was away from town the president of WGLA formed a committee to do the web site. One grrl in particular seems to have been told that she's running the show. I got onto this new "web team" list and started discussing what would be a good plan for the site. I was shot down every time by this grrl. The problem is is that I was elected by the membership to this position as web master. I'm pretty pissed that the leadership has, in effect, ambushed me and I don't understand why discussion hasn't taken place.

    The site is going to be dismantled and each section of the site will be handled by a different designer who will have total creative control over each section. This seems disastrous to me and I've said so only to be told that I've been let out to pasture. The thing that is really getting me is that there has not been one peep from leadership on this issue. Every time something difficult comes along for WGLA to address everyone clams up. It's so stupid and unprofessional. I've asked for the leadership to have an online chat with me so that I can get a reality check (I'm open to the fact that I need one) but I doubt anyone will take me up on it.

    The thing that I want to know is: why did I work so hard? Why did I try to make it look so great and to be coded so nicely and to be structured so perfectly? Why did I work so hard?

    And, just to be completely non-sequetious (word?)... T. and I saw American Pie last night and loved it. It was just too funny. Go see it for a laugh.