9.9.99

    1. I have to say that one of the single most disgusting things that I see people do in public (okay, actually I only see men doing this) is to hock a ball of phlegm onto the sidewalk. Just when did it become acceptable for a person to cock their head back, make a guttural sound at a frequency to dislodge a mass of snot buildup, aim vaguely at the ground and release a ball of mucus with a sickening splat? It's disgusting. If you're one of the people that does this then knock it off. There are plenty of other people in this world that manage to get by without making this an even occasional activity so figure it out.

    2. And, while I'm on the subject of snot. If you have to blow your nose and it requires more than a single, petite blast then please excuse yourself and find a restroom. Especially if you're sitting next to me at a lunch meeting. While you're in there, you can hock that loogey you've been holding back.

    3. Here's a question: what came first — the piddle on the seat or the balancing act? Ladies, if you really feel that the toilet you're using is too dirty for your precious little bum to touch then lay down some paper. You can either use an officially-sanctioned toilet-seat cover or just take some strips of paper and lay them down. If it's still too scary then find another bathroom. Don't attempt to hover over the toilet seat like you're the star of your very own magic show because unless you have quads of steel you won't be able to do it. Does it make sense to avoid the seat when your unstable wobbling over it is just going to get piddle on it? No one has ever caught anything from a toilet seat.

    4. Pick up after your dog. Before you even get a dog invest in some sort of poop-retrieval mechanism. This can be a scooper or a shovel or even your own hand in a plastic bag. Whatever it is just do it. There's nothing I like better than going long for a frisbee and sliding an extra four feet in your dog's excrement.

    5. Pick up after your god. I actually mistyped this one from above but decided it made some sense. If I ask you about your religion feel free to tell me all about it. This is social behavior. However, I don't need a treatise or pamphlets or instructions on how to handle my conversion. Feel free to name-drop your religion into every conversation that we have but don't expect me to care. In fact, expect me to avoid you as much as possible. If I inappropriately ask you how much money you make and about your political leanings then maybe you talk about your religion too much.

    6. Tailgaters should be shot. You don't need to be that close to my backside and while you're backing off maybe you could get rid of those silly fog lights that are, ya know, for fog. If you're driving a Lexus SUV ten inches from my bumper then expect me to brake suddenly and without cause — you obviously have some excess cash I can gladly take off your hands.

    I have been to two workouts at the gym this week. This might not seem like much except they were at the downtown gym before work. I showered there and everything. This is a big breakthrough. It does mean more planning on my part. I have to have all my workout paraphernalia (shorts, shirt, underwear, socks, sports bra, shoes, shampoo, hair dryer, water bottle, lock and towel) plus anything I need for work and the ride in to work (books, CDs, anything I brought home to work on) and I have to get it all together by 7 a.m. If I spring out of bed at 6 a.m. I can make the MAX by 7:15 which puts me downtown at 8. My workout takes approximately an hour, leaving half an hour for showering and getting to the office. So far, I've managed to walk in the door right smack at 9:30.

    9:30 is bordering on being too late. I think it's still acceptable because things really don't start hoppin' until then. However, that means that I usually don't get home before 7 p.m. What are ya gonna do? As I told a friend today, I intend to workout until I disappear in a calorie-free blip of light. It could be slow-going since I don't know how effective my workout is. I generally split the time between Nautilus weights and some cardio on either the bikes or the treadmill. I'm going to try to add a serious aerobic workout next week. I do a fairly full circuit on the weights, hitting all the major groups. I don't sweat here, though. I do sweat on the bike when I read a magazine. For some reason I go much faster when I'm not watching the readouts. If I cover them up with a magazine, just glancing from time to time to see how I'm doing, I'm usually shocked by how fast I'm going. Strange.

    Regardless, it feels good to be moving toward a goal. I don't know really whether I want to become a hard-core gym goer. There's something very odd about working your body in a gym and surrounding yourself in machinery that targets individual muscles and groups. I rationalize that we have to do these things because in our culture we're not lifting and tugging and slaying as part of our daily lives. Frankly, sitting at a computer all day does nothing for my body except expand it. What a strange people we have become.

    Things that I would like to learn and do in order to become a better designer:

1. DHTML & Javascript. My brain isn't wired to naturally pick up this programming. Rationally, I get it. To learn the syntax and be able to create elegant code with it is something I aspire to. I'll be the last person in the business to learn it if I can help it. As soon as I learn it it will become defunct, mark my words.
2. Director. This is used primarily for authoring CDs but can also be used to create extensive Flash presentations. It seems cool and while I don't necessarily think my career hinges on it, I'm pretty sure I'd be good at it and would excel.
3. Print. As in, print design and methods. I'm trying to get into this on my own. I have the very basics of how to get something to press but I don't fully understand CMYK and color separations and whatnot. Some of this stuff I learned waaay back in my graphic arts class in high school without really knowing what I was learning. I want to take a project from concept to print. I'm working on a brochure for my mom which is helping me along with this somewhat.
4. Sound. I have no background in sound. I don't have a language to use to discuss sound. I want to understand it and to create things with it.
5. Typography. I've been picking up here and there various books on typography. Something about type has always appealed to me and I'm trying to figure out what it is. I have Fontographer at home but haven't installed it yet. Of course, learning about type and creating type are two distinctly different things.
6. Genres of Design. I've been keeping track here and there of different classifications of design and I want to start making trips to the library to pick up books on them. I have loose understandings of most of them but I want images to fill my head. Some genres are: classical, neo-classical, modern, renaissance, romanesque, deco, pop, etc. (And, if you're looking at my weirdo list and thinking I've got it all wrong then please feel free to share the knowledge.)
7. School. Last but not least, I'd like to go to art school. I want to immerse myself in a creative and challenging atmosphere. I want to draw and paint and muse my way through my day. I want to critique and be critiqued. I want to create things that are not just transient amalgamations of ones and zeros. You know, nothing huge.